Project: Hot Mom

Yesterday started day 1 of my new program, which includes eating right and a killer kickboxing/strength routine 6 days a week. I can honestly say I've never been so excited about a fitness routine and am already addicted. I think it taps into my desire to take control of this aspect of my life. 

I pride myself in the fact that I've never been a yo-yo dieter. Actually the only diet I ever recall being on was the no bread, no beer, no pasta routine about a month before my first wedding. 

It's sad I can't really display these pictures anywhere- I love this shot of me, my mom and Aunt Lila. It was literally 100 degrees outside and I was trying to air things out a bit ;)

Now that I say that I remember my journey with food and it all went downhill about that time. Before that I didn't put much thought into what I ate. My roommate at the time- Rachel- was a health NUT, so I did pick up some of her tips in terms of working out, but I just didn't care about nutrition. I had just broken up with my college sweetheart, so naturally lost 10 lbs and people were telling me NOT to lose any more weight. Imagine that!

Thanksgiving 2003

Then I met my first husband, who was also a work out nut. I remember coming home from the bars one night- hungry- and making fried egg sandwiches with real butter. He said "I cannot believe you eat that shit!" I took that as a challenge and began an awful cycle of working out too much and not eating enough, hoping to hear from him that I needed to eat more. You can roll your eyes; it's even humiliating to type that.

I began travel nursing, and moved out to Delaware, living alone and working out twice a day- running in the morning than a full workout after work. I would eat lettuce with tuna for lunch and peanut butter for dinner. 

Then my Grandma Shaffer died. That sent me into a downward spiral... I remember leaving the gym early the day I got the news and going to the mall, wandering around aimlessly feeling so sad and lonely. By the time the mall closed I was so hungry I ordered a big plate of fried rice from Panda Express and ate the. whole. thing. To make matters worse I bummed a cigarette off of a perfect stranger on my way out...! By the time I got back to my apartment the guilt had taken over, and for the very first time I made myself throw up everything I had just eaten. Instead of feeling ashamed or embarrassed I felt... liberated...?! I could eat absolutely anything I wanted and just get rid of it... genius!

I won't bore you with all the details, but I will tell you that went on for about 5 years, after I had been married and divorced and got into a relationship with someone who truly cared for my well being- my husband Dustin :)

He wasn't harsh or judgmental, he just did not want me to do that to myself, and asked me to stop. And I did.

Although I haven't done "that" since before we married over 5 years ago, I haven't really had a healthy relationship with food either. The good news is that I haven't been obsessed over everything I put into my body, but the bad news is I haven't been obsessed over everything I put into my body ;) 

SO after putting on 10 extra lbs during my pregnancy and feeling icky in my own skin- not to mention the entire wardrobe in a size smaller that I can't fit into at the moment- I'm ready to obsess in the healthiest way possible.

Paleo is a great concept, but as my sister in law the nutritionist said "it's just not sustainable". The last thing I want to do is start something that isn't reasonable to continue forever. I don't enjoy cooking as-is; if I'm going to cook it better be something everyone can eat. I need a "real food" diet.

The nutrition portion of the Ferrell's program is so simple: eat 6 small meals a day which include a protein and a carb, lots of water, and unlimited veggies. I've got a log book to write down my meals, and I have a coach who helps to keep me accountable. Apparently it takes longer for women's metabolism to kick start (go figure) so it's a bit of a stretch but my 5 week goal is to lose 2% body fat. I started the diet yesterday, and can say I didn't feel hungry at ALL all day. My challenge is going to be staying away from caffeine (you're not supposed to have ANY!) and drinking enough water (80 oz/day). 

The kickboxing starts tonight. Here goes everything I've got! xx

 

long time no blog...

Wow what a whirlwind this past month has been. I'm behind on pretty much everything: correspondence, bills, blogging...

The good news is Megan and Andy's shower went without a hitch. It was so perfect! Aunt Shanne and I texted photos back and forth for weeks beforehand, and everything we had went together perfectly. The food was great. The flowers Uncle Todd and Leslee brought couldn't have set it off any better. I think everyone had a great time.

Grandma Shipman and Grandma Grabe

Leslee and Todd

The guests of honor

Jonah wasn't feeling the greatest :(

A group of Grabe girls

Thank you Pinterest for all the great ideas!

The food was great!

another Pinterest project....

Ashley found this great idea: "Thank Ewe for touching Megan and Andy's life, now you can touch their baby"!

it was crowded, but cozy

A guessing game.

Our house hasn't fully recovered yet, but I'm not overly concerned. I sure enjoyed every bit of the flowers sticking around after the company was gone :) Unfortunately Jonah was coming down with some awful upper respiratory infection and was so sick for his first Easter :( He was sick enough that we didn't even take him to Grandma's and instead took turns staying home with him.

This past week Jonah turned 10 months old, and my Dad was here for 2 nights for another minor surgery to get all the margins of the pre-cancerous cells. I did NOT freak out this time like I did before thank goodness. I think I got out all of my emotions for an entire year in that post not too long ago.

I took this month's photos in his jammies because they're so stinking cute. He still is just sporting the two bottom teeth, which the pediatrician says is nothing to worry about. He went from crawling everywhere as fast as a little spider to standing up every chance he can get! Last night he had a great time pulling everything off of the bottom two shelves of the bookcase in his room :) He'll be walking in no time. He's still a skinny little runt, weighing in the 9% and still long in the 75% for his age. 

He still loves music and will stop anything he's doing if he hears a song or someone sings to him. He loves puppets- whether on a Baby Einstein movie or in person. He doesn't have the attention span for his jumper or to watch anything on TV anymore; he has got more important things to do! ;)

He's developing his own little appetite which is challenging to figure out at times- especially since we really want him to eat up! He loves chicken, peanut butter and bread, but he's pretty much over any form of baby food that doesn't come in a squeeze pack. He also "ET's" everything, including the opening to the squeeze packs. He sticks his pointer finger in the hole every time to be sure it's patent :D

He's also recently discovered his man parts, which makes bath time pretty entertaining as it goes a little something like this: Splash, splash, wiener check, splash, splash, wiener check. It also makes changing his diaper a little easier; instead of attempting to escape to find something more interesting he spreads his legs and looks for whatever it is down there that feels funny ;) Who knew having a boy could be so fun?!

Speaking of having a boy... I got to be a part of my best friend's gender revealing party on Friday and they are having another BOY!!! I'm so excited for her and so excited for whenever our #2 joins us. 

Alright that's all I have time for today, but I have so much more on my list of blogs I want to write. Look for my battle of the bulge post (I'm starting the Ferrell's program tomorrow...gulP!) and also a post on what I deem to be the necessities of having a newborn. xx

 

~PuErTo RiCo~I

I had so much fun shopping for hats for this little guy :) 

I hate all photos of myself; especially in swimsuits! I'm looking at this as a "before" shot...

Papa and Jonah meeting the ocean for the first time :)

My handsome men

he LOVED the pool :)

A great purchase from Amazon... a travel high chair!

the view from our condo

the streets of Old San Juan

Hiking the rainforest. LOVE my Ergo carrier!

dipping our feet in the water from the waterfall

pictures never do justice

Old San Juan. This was actually my least favorite day of them all...

He's smiling because he just pooped in the sink! HAHAHA thank God for garbage disposals :)

A sandbox is on his birthday wish list :)

Nap time at the beach

my favorite photo.  Yes I am in swimwear.

Pina coladas taste so much better here

Luquillo Beach

I'm nuts about

coconuts!!! Coconut oil that is. I knew it was a true addiction when I scooped up a tupperware container full to bring with us on vacation. Initially I heard about it from my "pregnancy friends" as I call them. When I was pregnant I happened across an app which is an online community for moms. Several groups of women have different forums including: Trying to Conceive, Fit Pregnancy, Clean Eating, and my personal favorite: Postpartum Fitness. Those woman are both amazing and crazy. This is where the idea of the Paleo diet was first introduced to me (which is still just observational at this point). They've also helped me through some frustrating times in my battle of this baby bulge (more on that later).

Coconut oil was mentioned by said "pregnancy friends" as a super food of sorts. Someone mentioned bulletproof coffee as a way to kick start your metabolism and fat burning for the day and I was super intrigued. I drink coffee every morning anyway... so when I ran across a huge vat of coconut oil at Costco for only $16.99 I had to try it out. 

I've found I actually prefer it on my toast (so NOT paleo) in the morning, and I've also found so many other uses for it. I put it in my hair and let it sit for 30 minutes or so then shower and it feels like I've been to a salon afterwards it's SO soft. It's a great skin moisturizer. Since I typically don't wear bathing suits in the winter my skin was not used to the shaving required and I found myself with horrible razor burn in the most unacceptable area... so I slathered some coconut oil on before bed and it was GONE by morning!

I found this great article on Pinterest titled "333 uses for coconut oil". I'm so excited for my new find!

holy vacation batman

Nothing beats the sound of waves crashing in.  We were able to enjoy the instant relaxation that provides up north on Lake Superior last fall, and now again in Puerto Rico this time. Let the relaxation begin.

It was a long day!

but Jonah is all smiles still :)

It didn't take us long to find our favorite spot to sit

Jonah never ceases to amaze me. We were in flight for nearly 6 hours today and only once did he get a little fussy and it was because I accidently woke him up trying to get circulation to my hand. He’s just a happy little ham! At least 3 different people stopped to tell us what a good baby he is. I take that as us being good parents too :)

I’m trying not to think about Dustin’s flight home with him alone a week from now (followed by a week of being home with him alone while I’m at my work meeting here) and hope we can really unwind and enjoy ourselves. I pointed out to Dustin this vacation is nothing short of amazing for me- I’ve been gone and working so much to be able to enjoy my boys for 7 solid days is paradise!!! I’m excited to work on Jonah using a sippy cup- that whole situation has proved to be difficult and I haven’t had the time to work with him on it. I’m willing to bet he’s saying “dada” by the end of the week as he’s said it in passing a couple of times. One word he thinks is funny is “hat”. Dustin said one day he was playing with his baseball hat so he put it on Jonah and said “hat” and Jonah cracked up! Today while we were waiting for the rental car I said “where’s my hat?” and he grabbed the bill :D He’s so stinking smart.

He went in for his first “real” haircut on Saturday and was perfect. We went to Sport Clips so they had TV’s everywhere which helped avert his attention. I also had to wake him up from a nap when we arrived which I was afraid would end in disaster, but it actually helped the situation as he just laid on my shoulder and watched TV as the stylist trimmed away.

My boss rode with me last week and during lunch pointed out in the past year I’ve been through 3 of the 5 most stressful life events: having a baby, moving, and starting a new job. If someone would die and Dustin and I divorced I would have them all covered- :-/ 

Bring on vacation please~!!! xx

9 months!

I cannot believe we're at the 9 month mark already! I've started "pinning" ideas for Jonah's first birthday as I know it will be here before we know it.

Jonah is crawling faster than I've ever seen a baby crawl before, and typically he heads directly for something that belongs to the dogs-- their kennel doors are fun to swing open and shut, their water bowl is fun to splash in, and their kongs are fun to put in his mouth (I know- yuck is right!)

He's starting to "talk with his mouth closed" as I call it, as well as shaking his head "no". He's enjoying real people food which almost has me inspired to begin cooking dinner at night ;) xx

saturdays

gosh how i love saturdays. today the dogs are even feeling lazy- chopper didn't wake up and want breakfast at 5am like usual and the baby slept until 7!

Last night we went over to Dustin's cousins and played an awesome game and had a few cocktails. I said to him this morning: "last night is exactly the reason I wanted to come back... now are you happy we did?" and he is :) Friends and family folks, that's what life is all about.

Speaking of family- as two well deserving girls out east prepare for their little bundles of joy I know yet another mama patiently waiting for her turn to have a belly to rub. She opened up to me about it during a long phone conversation we had a few weeks ago. I wonder why God lets us wait...? I wish I had the answers. Some times I feel like even though I have been through a tiny bit of infertility I really don't have the right words to say. I do feel like God gave us Jonah right when we were ready for him, and that our life wouldn't be as perfect as it is right now if he had come when we were ready and waiting. I wish my sixth sense was believable...(okay please don't think I'm crazy but I swear I have a touch of ESP) I have no doubt she will have a baby of her own someday- I've had dreams! All I can do is pray for her to have peace and to embrace all the things she can do now before her world is flipped upside down for all the right reasons :)

I had a dream my sister in law was having a girl on the day she had her sex revealing ultrasound. I'm now on the other end of a couple knowing what they're having and not sharing... I want so badly to buy gender specific clothes! It is such a special time though and I totally get why they're keeping it a secret- it's the only time you have that baby all to yourselves. It's also nice to get the stuff you really need at your shower vs. a bunch of pink or blue that your guests just couldn't pass up buying. 

I finally got the invitations sent out for their shower, and due to the creative bug that bit me and caused me to doll them all up with with burlap they cost $2 each to mail! HA. It dawned on me the other day this is the first little party I've actually ever thrown for someone, so why not go all out. I'm so so so excited and hoping everything goes without a hitch. Since I'm hosting it solo I'm trying to recruit little helper bees- cousin Ashley is the queen of music... cousin Andrea is great for having "been there done that" so she has some game ideas... Aunt Karen makes cakes... Aunt Shanne is super creative and crafty so she's helping watch out for decorations... Aunt Jan is making blueberry muffins :) I started a new Pinterest board to come up with cute snack-y ideas. T minus 6 weeks!

We're also counting down until Puerto Rico~!!! A month from today we'll be enjoying some sunshine and family fun. My dad gave Jonah some Christmas money when he was here- and he also has a Target gift card from Grandma burning a hole in his pocket- all of which is going to outfit the little guy for our big trip :) So far we've gotten a few swimsuits, sunglasses, boat shoes and sandals, and my favorite purchase: a little baby fedora...! I just love Old Navy! I'll come back and post some pics; I'm having technical difficulties in that department at the moment.

Little man pulled himself to standing for the first time yesterday- Daddy told me when I got home. He is saying "mamamamamama" when he's upset- which was a lot this week unfortunately :( He had a little cold which caused for some serious sleeping issues. For the first time I actually brought my pillow and blanket into the nursery and slept on the floor while he watched his favorite movie- "Despicable Me"- on the ipad and played on the floor around me. 

Lack of sleep couldn't stop us from celebrating Valentine's the next day with dinner (at 4:30pm... HA!) and a family field trip to The NewBo City Market for cupcakes! Dustin got me a dozen roses, my favorite candy, and a sweet sweet card. Jonah surprised me by getting me a card too... I was so touched that Dustin thought to do that :))

my two handsome valentines :)

There's actually half of a French Toast cupcake calling my name right now... xx

Yes it does.

I think there's a new face every week!

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Naptime with mommy... except mommy stared at the sleeping baby rather than sleeping herself :)

Dinnertime out is becoming more of an adventure.